After waking up from long sleep and been greeted outside by midnight, cool moist air and silence, this thoughts just dawned on me and it make sense. I just lost 3 games straight earlier this day; and many more from the other day- both in the game and myself. I just feel bad and feel like somethings missing. And i found it i guess.
FUN. I tried to do everything mechanically and on measure, leaving the essence of playing. I focus too much on gaining that magical 25 that I forgot how to have fun. How to just play for fun. And it is supposed to be on both edge- wether u win or lose. I grinded from 2.8 to 4k+ bcos I enjoyed what I'm doing. I guess i lost sight of that and focus too much on climbing higher. I read too many guides and tutorials that i became more like them than my own self. I copied and followed. I became a toxic player to myself and to everyone i played. I flame and blamed. I became self-centered and egotistic player. It shud change. And I'll start today.
After waking up from long sleep and been greeted outside by midnight, cool moist air and silence, this thoughts just dawned on me and it make sense. I just lost 3 games straight earlier this day; and many more from the other day- both in the game and myself. I just feel bad and feel like somethings missing. And i found it i guess.
FUN. I tried to do everything mechanically and on measure, leaving the essence of playing. I focus too much on gaining that magical 25 that I forgot how to have fun. How to just play for fun. And it is supposed to be on both edge- wether u win or lose. I grinded from 2.8 to 4k+ bcos I enjoyed what I'm doing. I guess i lost sight of that and focus too much on climbing higher. I read too many guides and tutorials that i became more like them than my own self. I copied and followed. I became a toxic player to myself and to everyone i played. I flame and blamed. I became self-centered and egotistic player. It shud change. And I'll start today.